I Promise (AmazingPhil x Reader)
by go.ask.alice34
Summary: Dan never had the best temper behind closed doors. Why else would Phil have moved out? You finally get pushed to the edge, and Phil takes you under his wing.
1. Chapter 1

**Warning: abuse, depression/implied self harm**

 **AN: Please don't hate me. I love Dan and Phil both so much, and I definitely don't view Dan as anybody who would treat a person this way. Just read and enjoy~**

 **p.s. idk if I want to add a few extra parts to this or just leave it as is. Let me know what I should do. Thanksss**

"I'm tired of all this, Y/N!" Dan threw his hands angrily into the air. "I swear, at this point, you're only pretending to be sad!" You looked up at him, his figure blurry through your tears. Despite crying, you felt rage boil up inside of you. You stood slowly, not taking your eyes off of him.

"What did you just say to me?" you say, teeth clenched.

"I was willing to make you feel better during the beginning of your 'depression'," he put air quotes around the word, "but now it just seems like you're faking it to get my attention." Dan's voice seemed angrier with every word he spoke. Normally when he would get mad, you'd feel small and scared. This was a different story; you couldn't help but feel so much resentment towards him at that moment. "And your scars," he continued, "they used to worry me so much. You don't even try to hide them anymore. It's like you want me to see them and feel bad for you!"

Tears ran freely down your cheeks. You couldn't even bring yourself to look at him for fear of ripping his stupid face off. All you did was run to your room, ready to grab the bag you'd had packed for weeks. Three, to be exact. You packed it that very first night that Dan started to say those hateful things to you. You honestly weren't sure how you put up with it for even that long. You were leaving, and you knew exactly where to go. Dan was sitting on the couch, hunched over with his hands on his knees. He caught sight of you leaving with your bag.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" He stood up and grabbed your arm, refusing to let go, even with you struggling.

"I'm going to Phil's, Dan! Let me go!" You were starting to cry again.

"Oh sure! Run off to Phil's! He's sensitive enough, so he'll listen to your little sob story." You ripped yourself free of his grip.

"This is exactly the reason he moved out," you said quietly to him.

"You'll be begging to get back into my arms by tomorrow. You'd better hope I'm feeling generous enough to let you," he hissed.

You shook your head and ran out the door, glad to get away. You instantly felt weight being lifted off your shoulders. You wandered around the streets for a bit until you found a bench to sit on. It was summer, but the rain was cooling your skin to the point of shivering. You pulled out your phone and contemplated whether or not Phil was still awake. It was 1:26, but you decided to text him anyway.

 _hey, phil? sorry it's so late. I got in a fight with dan and I sorta need a place to stay.._

 _aw I'm sorry to hear that! of course you can stay. do you need me to pick you up?_

 _I was going to catch a cab but that would be nice :) I'll wait outside dan's place_

 _I'll be there in ten, Y/N :)_

You sighed. Phil was such a sweet guy. You made your way back to Dan's apartment only to find him standing out front with his arms crossed. The rain made his hair stick to his forehead, and the way the lights were hitting his face made him look even more sinister.

"You back already, Y/N?" Dan asked with a mocking sound to his voice.

"You wish, asshole." You watched his smirking face turn into rage. He paced quickly towards you. Before you had time to react, the back of his hand struck your face and left it stinging. You tried to run away or at least say something, but the shock of what had just happened left you speechless. You clung to your cheek. He'd never hit you before. _Ever_. He raised his hand to do it again, but he stopped when he heard Phil's voice.

"Y/N, get in the car." It sounded dark, its usual cheery tone lost. He stepped out of his car and came face-to-face with Dan. "You keep your hands off of her," he spat.

You were practically stumbling over yourself to get your bag into the car because of what had just happened. You felt like a baby deer trying to walk for the first time. You looked at the two men, terrified. Dan said something to Phil that you couldn't hear. Phil balled his fists at his sides but turned around and began to walk back to the car, his eyes blazing. You sat in the passenger seat, helpless and afraid of what might happen next.

"Phil, before you know it, that bitch will be walking all over you," Dan hissed. Phil said nothing and looked straight ahead as he drove away.

The car ride was silent. You didn't know what to say to him. He parked his car outside of his apartment, but he didn't make any move to get out. You sat and waited for him to do something.

"Why didn't you tell me, Y/N?" He asked, his voice still dark, but slightly broken.

"Tell you what?" You tried to search his face for an answer, but he stared down at the steering wheel.

"That he hit you like that." He finally looked at you, and his blue eyes were swimming with tears.

"Phil, that was the first time it ever happened. I'm just as surprised as you." You paused for a moment. "I actually got fooled into thinking he loved me."

"That is not love!" Phil yelled as he slammed his fist onto his dashboard. You jumped a bit, not expecting his voice to raise. He took a deep breath and spoke more softly. "That's not love, Y/N." You began to cry silently.

Phil grabbed your hand gently and held it with both of his. You said nothing as he kissed your forehead and wiped your tears from your cheeks with his thumb.

"I won't let him or anybody else hurt you," he whispered. "I promise."


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Sorry it's been a while. I actually completely forgot about this story...oops aha...also I'm typing this from a different computer that's not as good, so excuse any format differences from the first chapter if there are any. this is sorta a short chapter, so it's more like chapter 1.5, but I'll still call it 2. anywho, enjoy chapter 2. that rhymed. nice.**

Phil hadn't spoken more than a few words to you since you got inside. Now, he finishes leaning over the stove and plops a plate of eggs in front of you. His brows are furrowed together, and it's still alarming you to see him without his usual light smile and sweet laughter.

"Phil?" You ask. His change of attitude since you got out of the car is strange.

"I can't believe this shit happened." His eyes are ablaze as he begins to furiously scrub the few dirty plates in the sink.

"Look," you say curtly, "you don't have to worry about this. It's all behind me now. He's history." Phil's eyes meet yours, and you notice how dull and solemn they seem. He looks down again without acknowledging what you said. "Phil, talk to me," you say, trying to get him to look you in the eyes again.

"That's what you said last time this happened," he mumbles to himself.

"Excuse me?"

He looks up at you, his face still stone-cold. "Don't you remember what happened when I moved out?"

Of course you remember. You could never forget. You could see the tension between Dan and Phil off the camera, but they continued to be buddies in their videos, often having to stage what they were going to say. This tension wasn't the sexual tension all of their fans were hoping for, but more of a I'm-going-to-kill-you-at-any-given-moment kind of tension. They would argue all the time over the smallest things. You saw it as a rough patch in their friendship that they would soon get over because they always got over it. Before long, the anger they had towards each other was even starting to come through in their videos. Their fans could see it, they could see it, you could see it. Phil had gone out for the day, so you were home alone with your boyfriend of a year, Dan. He saw this as an opportunity to get it on with you. You weren't in the mood. He was most definitely in the mood. You said no, he said yes. You got up to walk away, he grabbed your arms. You struggled, he held you down. You tried to scream, he covered your mouth with his hand. You lost your virginity in the sickest way imaginable, he told you not to tell. You held the truth in for nearly a month until the day Phil saw you cutting. He begged you to tell him what was wrong. You started to say that you had a bad day, but then you told him everything. He confronted Dan, Dan shoved him. They yelled. Dan yelled. Dan yelled at you. Dan didn't stop yelling at you and making you feel worthless. Phil moved out. He asked you if you wanted to come along. You told him you would. You said you were done with Dan and that you never wanted to see him again. You didn't go. Why didn't you go? You still loved Dan, even after what he'd done to you. At this point, you told Dan you were depressed. He lightened up quite a bit for a while. You thought he loved you. You thought he'd take care of you. He did for a little while.

"Y/N.,." Phil wipes tears from your cheeks you didn't even know were falling. "I'm so sorry."

"For what?" Your voice quivers. You try not to look in his eyes because you'll let the new waves of tears forming in your eyes come out if you do.

"I'm sorry about what happened. I'm sorry I didn't come help you sooner than tonight." He grabs your hands again and holds them tight. You don't respond to him. "I'll set up the couch for you. Your bag's in the living room if you wanted to change."


End file.
